lets grow old together.

2012-01-31T20:28:00.004+08:00

It has been a good couple of weeks. I like being around you. I'm happy with where I am right now but something just feels off. It feels like something is missing. I'm not sure what is it. Its true. I'm a runner. I run, I avoid, I don't like facing problems and just runaway from it. I did an online survey and its true.

"Combining your anxiety and avoidance scores, you fall into the fearful quadrant. Previous research on attachment styles indicates that fearful people tend to have much difficulty in their relationships. They tend to avoid becoming emotionally attached to others, and, even in cases in which they do enter a committed relationship, the relationship may be characterized by mistrust or a lack of confidence."

This really explains alot why I am how I am right now. In today's UR class, the lecturer talked about conflicts. The negative conflicts and positive conflicts and that we should have positive conflicts in our relationship. That is where communication lies and if there wasn't any fights means there is a problem.

I think what went wrong with me and him was that, communication. I know what I did was wrong. Its my fault. But I think it could have turned out better if we had better communication. Sure, you are the 'secure' one and I'm the 'Avoidant' but I need someone who can be firm and tell me straight up if something I do is not right or if they are not happy with something. I do not want you to always give in and just pretend you are okay with it. I loved you. Always have, always will. It feels like something is off. Like its still left hanging. Everytime I see you, I get weak. I miss you. Your smile, your laughter, your patience, your 'act cool' moments. I miss it all. But I got to learn how to let it go. Like I said, you deserved someone better. And, "If two people are meant to be together, eventually they'll find their way back.", I will always remember this.

2012-01-12T02:44:00.004+08:00

First IVP against SMU was a success. We won them, 6-0. It was something new. I feel that the whole team stepped up a level, together. I could see that it was really a team effort. Everyone put in their all in the game. I feel so proud and it was such a confident boost for the team. But for now, its not the time to get complacent and slack off cos our next match is with SIM. I do not think that they are so good. I think we can win them. We just have to work harder on our defence and communicate more on our attack and set-ups. WE CAN DO THIS GIRLS!

Anyways, before the game I felt so nervous and scared and excited and nervous, nervous and more nervous. I swear it was so bad that I really could not contain the feeling that I felt my heart beating so fast. But ATB really calmed me down. At first it was the soft approach of cooling me down but it didnt help. At all. Then soon he feeling feeling wannabe coach, he talked like one. Haha. It was quite funny but it really helped. I like it when he called me 'young lady'. Its funny and noone ever calls me that. The main point was I was cooled down and Coach cooled me down as well. I really needed that. It was a really great evening. :)

p/s: Anak Tengah B. ;)

2012-01-04T19:13:00.001+08:00

hi east boy, i miss you.

2012-01-03T00:46:00.002+08:00
 
She's sitting at the table, the hours get laterHe was supposed to be hereShe's sure he would have calledShe waits a little longer, there's no one in the drivewayNo one's said they seen himWhy, is something wrong?She looks back to the windowSuddenly the phone ringsA voice says somethings happenedThat she should come right nowHer mind goes to DecemberShe thinks of when he asked herHe bent down on his knees firstAnd he said

I, I want you forever, forever and alwaysThrough the good and the bad and the uglyWe'll grow old togetherForever and always

She pulls up to the entranceShe walks right to the front deskThey lead her down a million halls a maze that's never endingThey talk about what happened but she can barely hear themShe tries to keep a straight face as she walks into the roomShe sits by his bedside, holds his hand too tightThey talk about the kids they're gonna have and the good lifeThe house on the hillside, where they would stay

Stay, there forever, forever and alwaysThrough the good and the bad and the uglyWe'll grow old together, and always rememberWhether rich or for poor or for betterWe'll still love each other, forever and always
Then she gets and idea and calls in the nursesBrings up the chaplain and he says a couple versusShe borrows some rings from the couple next doorEverybody's laughing as the tears fall on the floorShe looks into his eyes, and she says

I, I want you forever, forever and alwaysThrough the good and the bad and the uglyWe'll grow old together, and always rememberWhether happy or sad or whateverWe'll still love each other, forever and alwaysForever and always, forever and always
She finishes the vows but his beeps are getting so lowHis voice is almost too lowAs he says, I love you forever, forever and alwaysPlease just remember even if I'm not thereI'll always love you, forever and always

p/s: hey You, i want you forever and always, through the good, the bad and the ugly.

Over and done with CTs

2011-12-20T01:10:00.004+08:00

Common Test are over and today is the first week of the 2-weeks holiday. The first week of the holidays will be filled with projects and more projects. Just hope everything gets done asap then we can enjoy our holidays.

Anyways, last weekend was a great weekend. The last day of paper was on a Friday. After paper I went home, waited for mum to end work and went Harnie Beauty. Aroma theraphy for her and myself. Later that evening after we went home, I waited for Zaidi and he fetched me and we went Strictly pancakes for the first time ever. It was really a surprise. I didn't even had a clue we were going there. The food there, was really awesome like it was said to be. Huge serving. Later after that we walked endlessly from Dhoby Ghaut to Orchard part of town for quite awhile till we were tired and we walked back and headed to Mustafa to get chocolates for Kakak's engagement. It was an evening well spent with good company I would say. :)

2011-12-09T19:44:00.002+08:00

Common Test next week. Gotta start burning the midnight oil this weekend! Studying tomorrow with Zedooood after the jendela talk. Hafta really muggggggg. Kill all the brain cells in my brain and squeeze all the brain juice outxzzz.

tv shows

2011-12-06T00:10:00.001+08:00

Okay so today I skipped morning lessons. I was having flu and sore throat. I procrastinated and woke up late cos i was too tired and felt sick. Went to the clinic to get medicines and MC for morning class. The day was good. Was supposed to celebrate Zaty’s birthday by going dinner but I got caught up with projects and assignments. I felt bad but this few weeks are gonna be tiring and packed. Its Common test week next week so i have no time to waste. Need start mugging alr. Like really mugging.

Tomorrow is the first day of my IS class, understanding relationship. Kinda excited. They say its a good IS module. Hopefully I can sort of relate to the module and score well for it. Plan on waking up early to study PYM first tomorrow. But we’ll see how it goes first.

Anyhow, I just watched Gossip girls and I’m done with Vampire Diaries. I’m just waiting for the latest episode to be aired so I can watch. So excitedddd. I am really looking forward to VD and GG. Now I just started on The Big Bang Theory. They say its a good show but I have not really got about watching it. Gonna start soon and bury myself with it during the term break! J

p/s: never do i go a day without thinking of you.

a cliche

2011-12-04T01:04:00.003+08:00

"if its meant to be, it will happen"

i see you saying this everywhere. twitter, tumblr, your text messages to me. why? why do you have to say that. why are you giving me the slightest of hope? i've hurt you enough. i do not want you to be nice to me. you should be hating me. you should not be talking to me. you should be mean to me. that way, i can't even have the chance to hurt you the slightest bit. but by saying that, you're giving me the slightest of hope. its like you want it to happen again IF fate brought us back together. why don't you have the feeling of even IF fate brought us back together again, you do not want it cos you've had enough. why? cliche.

p/s: but giving it another go seems nice.

chalet

2011-12-03T23:57:00.003+08:00

Last night at Pasir Ris Aloha Loyang Bungalow Chalet #12. It has been quite a fun filled weekend. We spent the Saturday reliving the good old days. We played rounders and badminton at the parking lot infront of the bungalow. It was really something. It has been like forever since last I played rounders. Ayah made the bat himself with the old bed frame. D.I.Y. There were alot of spread of food and snacks and cakes! 3 different kinds of cakes. I think I had too much chocolates that my throat hurts right now.

Today, some of my friends came over too. Sufiyan, Syafiq and Nazrin Bob. They came after maghrib. I thought they were not coming but they did. I was glad they did. I was kinda hoping they would come. Anyways, Ayah came back from work soon after they arrived. So when they were eating, Ayah was at the table and Ayah entertained them. It was quite funny. Luckily Ayah was there. So it wasn't so awkward.

And we talked. Maybe to people its just a normal feeling, but I was glad. I was really happy. You were there. It meant so much to me. I know you came cos Ibu invited you over. But it still meant so so much to me. Just seeing you, talking to you, being around you makes me happy. I miss your laughter, your smile, your smell, everything about you. Its all too late now and I do not expect anything out of it anymore cos I blew it. I blew my last chance with you but I'm just glad and happy, to know that you're happier now. Without me. :)

p.s: and afterall, you're my wonderwall

2011-12-02T16:58:00.003+08:00

Hey you, I miss you. I've done you wrong. Over and over again. I'm sorry. Deeply sorry for everything. I was stupid. Wrong choices and mistakes were made. I regret it all. I apologise. If things were to happen again, for the last time, I promise you, this time round i will put my all, my heart and soul for this to work out. I promise you, me.

2010.

2010-05-11T14:58:00.002+08:00

My dead blog is slowly reviving. So have some patience, especially Ima. ^^

2009-10-30T23:30:00.001+08:00

Baby, I got two words for you,
come back.

p/s: I'll be gone long.

2009-04-03T22:06:00.006+08:00

kindergarten-not primary school- back to secondary school friends. :)

primary to secondary. we may not be the bestest friends of all but friendships do last long huh.

Sports day.

It was sports day just now. These are photos only from my phone. The rest are in Fid, Jowena and Steph's camera. Last year in Hilly and the cheerleading didnt suck. Enjoyed myself. AND feel a lil guilty. Those who know, you know. I dont have the whole group's photo but there are the photos in school's camera. I'll try to figure out a way to find it. Hmmm.

Although we don't look like a cheerleader, we still enjoyed ourselves pretty much. I know I'll miss secondary school cheerleading. n_n

noi.

p.s: I'll upload all my other special occasions at a go after 10 april. n_n

2009-03-05T11:54:00.007+08:00

bob and his classic faces. and thats naseef beside him.

bestest of all.

went out with my most favourite group of friends. the netballers. Kak ika drove. We dress up dress up nice nice. best best. Kak ika memperkenalkan kami with shine. best best. We took truckloads of photos with them. Best best. many new found friends. n_n

p.s: this is like 20% of all the photos taken.

noi n_n

2009-01-29T22:02:00.005+08:00

Desperate for your voice...

Waiting for your call, I'm sick, call I'm angry
Call I'm desperate for your voice
Listening to the song we used to sing
In the car, do you remember
Butterfly, Early Summer
It's playing on repeat, Just like when we would meet

I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight

Stripped and polished, I am new, I am fresh
I am feeling so ambitious, you and me, flesh to flesh
Because every breath that you will take
when you are sitting next to me
will bring life into my deepest hopes, What's your fantasy?
What's your...

I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight

And I'm tired of being all alone,
and this solitary moment makes me want to come back home
(I know everything you wanted isn't anything you have)

I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight

Been listening to this song over and over again and getting all teary over and over again. I miss the strumming of the guitar and this song been sung over the phone. I kinda miss all the phonecalls, all the singing, all the study days and I miss you. So much. Why was the page been turned over and I had to move on and get stuck in all these mess. I swear I wouldn't have these problems if the page wasn't turned over. Seriously. But what to do, just have to face all these mess and just make do with whatever I have now. With all the friends I have left. Haish.

noi.

LABELS: I will be lying to myself if I say I've gotten over you.

2009-01-03T01:16:00.003+08:00

First day of school.

First day was alright. Class seating arrangement was acceptable. I think. At least I can see the board. Real clearly. The new principal is alright. The new timetable looks fine. At least i can wake up later on Tuesdays. But the school hours now are long. Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays, school ending at 5. Remedials. Actually I feel excited studying. But I'm lazy. Sheesh. Must study. Must try.

I almost got the shock of my life. An old friend just told me hes gtoing NS on Monday. It scared the shit out of me. Seriously. For a moment there I felt a loss. Like I'm going to miss him. Like missing a really old friend I've known all my life. But it turned out otherwise. Felt so relieved and haapy. And idk why. I'm done for now. Telly, food and bed awaits. n_n

LABELS: i think i miss my old friend, euphoria, badly.

2008-12-01T12:56:00.003+08:00

Things are changing. Hes changing. He doesn’t want me to leave him. Hes trying to change for the better. Efforts can be seen. I’m glad. But I lost my friends. I don’t know how to regain sight of all that’s lost. It too much. Too overwhelming. I miss my friends.

Noi.

LABELS: overwhelmed.

2008-11-26T22:51:00.003+08:00

I’m in a tight position. I want to give up. I can’t do this anymore. I need someone to motivate me to do it. I can’t bring myself to leave him but I’m tired. I can’t do this anymore. My parents don’t even like me befriending him. I don't want to be the trouble/problem kid at home. And I still love my friends. Now see what happens. I’m losing all my friends. The ones who have been there for me since I started my secondary school life. It can’t just end like this. Too much memories to lose.

I can’t be the only one he hopes and depends on. I have my own life to lead too. A very busy one. Sometimes he makes me feel quite tied down too. I’m not ready for all the promises, commitment and pressure. Its not easy. With someone like him, and my friends not accepting him and his friends not accepting my friends. Difficult. I’m just fifteen. What do you expect? I’m supposed to be studying or whatever shit. I don’t have anyone who really understands how I feel and to pour all my shits to. Haish.

And oh, I have a long list of things to buy but I’m super broke. :( Can someone bring me out shopping and treat me. n_n

Noi.

Labels: I seriously can’t do this anymore. I think I'm leaving him sooner or later.

2008-11-17T23:12:00.008+08:00

Happy belated birthday Botak. n_n

Went out on the 4November. It was Botak's birthday. S and me gave him shoes that we drew. The left is drawn with cool drawing while the left is drawn with cute cupcakes and pretty stuffs. Went wonder girls concert at night. Best best. I'm lazy to go into details about that day. So I won't bother.

noi.

2008-11-17T21:51:00.005+08:00

Happy 2 Years Anniversary Hunnies.

Noiz,

Happy 2 years anni. We've turned a year older together. Not easy huh. Having the ups and more downs. But we still managed surviving the 2nd year together. Not like some other people who claims to have groups like NOIZ but in the end split. Nonsense. Haish.

We decided to have a stay home celebration again due to the camp the next day which I didn't managed to go cos of diarrhoea. We watched 'Love Guru' and eat our western food. Best best.

Lets plan a really nice outing for next year's celebration together with after 'O' celebration. n_n

noi.

2008-11-12T21:05:00.003+08:00

Goodness gracious. I just realized I’ve not been updating my blog for super so long. Busy busy. Just came back from ATC. It was fcuktabulous. Joined Area one. North side. It was so best. Admiralty people was the best cliques. They are fun funny people. I like my groupmates. People like Faiz, Khairul, Mun, Syafika and many many more. And oh I always get tegured by Faiz cause I burp too loud. Hee. And and and, my favourite part of the camp was the someone pujok-ing me to shower with Ima. *wriggle eyebrows* *jeng, jeng, jeng*. Best best la. Haish. n_n

noi.

oh ya, Happy belated birthday bby. n_n

2008-09-07T17:33:00.004+08:00

i want to eat putu piring, Ramly, dengdeng, kebab, laksa and satay ah. *grins from ear to ear*

LABELS: i love food.

2008-09-01T23:45:00.006+08:00

Sadded.

Suddenly all the sad emotions came rushing to me. Feel like crying after every sad songs. I think this is the after effect of that particular day. Kept smiling to myself when I reread our past conversations. Kind of miss everything. But whatever it is, live has to go on. No point holding on. Nothings is left except memories and the green carebear. The page has been turned over and its already too late to regain sight of all that is lost. Sad? Definitely. Just have to look at the glass half full.

noi.

LABELS: EUPHORIA,imy

2008-08-10T09:44:00.009+08:00

Finally after SHITLONG months not updating. Been busy, been stress, been sad. Let the photos do the talking ya.

OH! yesterday, National day, saw the trainboy at padang! Fuh! Teramat sangat comel. *runs to the freezer* :p

National Day '08

Pertunangan Kak Marni

streets fest beb!

last photo.

deblaze

2008-05-07T20:53:00.002+08:00

DE'BLAZE.

Wannabe some dont-know-mats-slesh-konon cool-rapper.

Haha, as you've seen, its DEBLAZE again. Yeah. Been practicing for Saturday IF its confirmed. But who cares if there isn't any performance. We had truckloads of fun huh. Its a serious stress reliever for post examination which have been killing all my brain cells. I can dance, I can dance, I can dance. All I need is just DEBLAZE. :)

noi.

p.s: puh-lease dont mind or pay much attention to the photos. oh ya, Mal is missing. ):

2008-05-01T13:22:00.002+08:00

Nomore brain cells.

Each and every brain cells of mine are dead due to the bluh-deh exams. Pfft. i'm getting all excited for July. Woohoo. And oh Nadiah is losing! Huhu. Member stress kalah main PSP :p
okay bye.

Kocek koyak.

2008-04-06T11:30:00.003+08:00

KOCEK KOYAK

Wuuu. Its April! I'm all so excited but so in need of muh-neh. I have truckloads of april babies friends. They are Ani Silat (9/4), Mummeh (9/4), Ashikin (10/4), Arnia (14/4), Rafidah (15/4), Suaidi (26/4) and not forgetting Abg Wan's present! I still have not get him anything and his virthday is on the 22 March. Can you believe it. Its like 2 weeks ago. I seriously need to get him something. Oh ya, I also need to buy a blouse, skirt and a pair of covered heels. Leceh eh no muh-neh lagi. I'm going out later to get their presents and the blouse, skirt and shoes later but noone accompanying me. ):
Okay dah time for bed. Going out later.

P.s: people, please label 10 april on your calender for MY birthday. :p

Shocking

2008-03-25T16:43:00.001+08:00

My heart skipped a beat when they came in and suddenly said “Wah noi seh, Chief”. I got all scared and panicked for awhile. I do not want to be Chief. All the responsibilities, the speech writing, going on stage, being a good role model. Haha. Me? Noi as a role model. Like tak boleh percaya gitu. Eh super fuckload scary uh.

Trust me, I’ve even thought of rejecting but pretty Misliana said cannot. Everything is already finalised. I do not know a single shit about organising big events. All I know is organising outing with my girlfriends. I’m seriously totally lost but thank god, I have my friends, Ima, Fid, Zaty, Amira and most importantly Misliana. Misliana said shes going to guide me. So, she CANNOT go back on her words. Oh ya, Faizal(current chief), is also going to ‘guide’ me. Haha. Zaty zaty. You know I know, I know you know hah. *wriggle eyebrows*.

Haha. I don’t think Misliana was like this when she first heard that she was Deputy director. Haha. Takot siol. Haha. I can do it. Insyallah.

Grey's Anatomy.

2008-03-15T02:10:00.003+08:00

I could promise to hold you, and to cherish you. I could promise to be there, in sickness and in health. I could say till death do us part. But I won't. Those are for optimistic couples, the ones full of hope. I do not stand here today optimistic or full of hope. I am not optimistic. I am not hopeful. I am sure. I am steady. I'm a heart person. Take them apart, put them back together, hold them in my hands. I am a heart person. So this, I am sure. You are my partner. My lover. My very best friend. My soul mate. My heart. My heart beats for you.

And now I promise you this, I promise you to lay my heart in the palm of your hands, I promise you, me.

-Dr Burg, Greys Anatomy.

I was taken in and almost cried when I heard this in Greys Anatomy.

Surprisingly missing him.

2008-02-15T22:59:00.002+08:00

Abg went to Thailand last Saturday and will be back after 12 days. Surprisingly I miss him. Hes my brother after all. Went to send him off. His flight was at 6am but he checked in at 4am. We send him and went home at 6am. Didn't went madrasah. Mum wasn't at all angry. (:

Oh ya, you people just do not know how nice he can be sometimes. He may be strict or unfriendly but he just do what is told. He does have a good heart. You all just can't see it. I pity you. You all just see that he is mean ALL THE TIME. Don't talk bad about him to me when Im in a good mood. Dont dampen my mood with our somments. Thank you.

noi.

p.s: i do miss him. (:

Ujian at Bedok CC '07

2007-12-17T21:10:00.000+08:00

Ini Suaidi Bin Mawardi. (:

Ini Aini Mawardi. My partner.

My all time favourite people at Silat. (:

Itu Saidi Mawardi.(:

Ini kami. (:

Ini Amirah Ramli. (:

Ini Sufhian Suhaimi. (:

Ini Bfie.

Yesterday there was an ujian silat ar Bedok CC. I didn't join this year but I'll be joining the next year. I followed the rest there to give my 'moral support'. Hee. Aini, Amirah and myself were just watching them and at the same time, we watched how what we are supposed to do for our ujian next year. It was so scary. The leap frog and all the 'mengambur'. I could have sworn that I had butterflies in my tummy just by looking at them. Imagine if we're going to do. Pray for me and wish me luck. I so envy them cos they already change their tali pinggang. Now, I'm more motivated to work hard to learn the 'kunci' and pass next year. Suadi was like motivating me also. Hee. And now, the others and me have planned to meet up 2 hours earlier to practice. Aren't we really 'semangat' or what. Hee. I took photos with everyone. EXCEPT AJEIL. Pffft. So much for 'nanti nanti'. Grr. Oh ya, met up with Bfie. Miss him so much. (:
noi.

LABELS:i'm going to work extra hard and not let the others step over my head just because they are the same tali pinggang as me. (:

Happy Birthday Nur Ezzaty Bte Rahmat.

2007-12-14T01:38:00.000+08:00

Favourite photo ever. Macam cute mabuk people with yummy donuts kan.

It was Ezzaty's birthday on the 5 december. We, Ima, Fid and myself, baked not one but two cakes especially for her with LOVE. We don't bake neither we cook but we did manage to bake the cakes. It was fun baking. Won't go into details about what happened when we reached Zaty's house. Nevertheless, we did had so much fun. We took a decent photo of NOIZ.

noi.

LABELS:happy birthday nur ezzaty bte rahmat. ily.

Hmms.

2007-12-12T00:35:00.000+08:00

I do not know why theres always an understandings or problems occur. Its not like I want it to happen. I do not want wish to hurt anyone. Okay fine I'm sorry if I did say something that could have hurt you or made you feel like I'm a hypocrite. People make mistakes. Yes they do. But they will never know unless they're told. They can't see for their own. And yes 'sorry' may just be another 5-letter word. It may not mean anything if we continue making mistakes and keep on saying it. But whatever it is, everyone do feel like sometimes they are the ones who are the ones who feel like they're blamed for everything and they are the only ones who need to take care of people's feelings. Sometimes, I would just distance myself to the people around to avoid miscommunications. There will never be a smooth-sailing friendship without an misunderstandings or problems or miscommunications or whatever bullocks there may be. Its just a part and parcel of life. How cliche. But its just true. The weirdest thing is, what is the point of holding on to those important people if they only push you away. Hmms.

noi.

Gathering at East Coast Park

2007-12-04T21:16:00.000+08:00

Went to East Coast Park on the 2 December with the ATC mates. It was so fun. Had shitloads of fun there. Taking photos, playing with the sand and stuff.
Went home with Sir faizal, Kak ziqah, Kak zanna, Sir saiful, Sir ilyas, Khai, Faiz and Sri. We walked almost for an hour just to reach our eating place. It was so crowded. Then something happened. I was so shocked. Okay won't get into the details. I really pity SS cause hes too stress and has so many problems. He always go to the beach or jetty alone to release his stress. Lent him a listening ear and listened to his problems. Well, hope that he solve all his problems. As for the rest of the day, let the photos do the talking.

He and Sir Ilyas followed me and Ima cause he wanted to take a photo with me. Isn't that sweet :p

Sir Saiful, NOI and Sir Ilyas. (:

Crazy, happy people. (:

Hes like the brother I've never had. Hmm.

noi.

LABELS:i miss bfie so much. it feels like we've grown apart. but i still love him thou (:

Busy November week. (:

2007-11-29T21:17:00.000+08:00

Wild Wild Wet 25Nov (:

Went Wild Wild Wet the day after ATC. It was so fun but tiring. I'm now sunburnt cause of San John Island student leader camp, NPCC ATC camp and Wild Wild Wet. But it was worth it afterall. (:

Present hunting 26Nov/Happy 5 months hunny (:
Went out with Fid to look for Zaty's present. On the way there, Mal called. Asked her to tag along as well. While waiting for her, we ate Ben & Jerry's we really enjoyed ourselves with the ice cream getting fat. (:

Oh ya, met up with Hunny and Syamsyam. Exchanged our 5 months anni gift with Hunny. He gave me this cute carebear which I've been eyeing on and I gave him a Quicksilver wallet. He liked it. (:

Fourskin's fitting room has always been our thing huh.

2E3 Class Barbeque. 21Nov (:

Fid, Ima, Aizat and myself went to East Coast Park for 2E3's class barbeque. Fid and I were just extras accompanying Ima cause we aren't from 2E3. The train ride was super long. We went crazy inside the train. I looked so retarded. Seriously. When we reached there, Fid and I went far away to play with the sand, sea and camwhored. It was fun. Ima was pushed in the sea by Khaliesah while she was pushing Khaliesah in. Great huh. In the end, Ima spoled both her mobile phones cause she totally forgotten to take it out. Zaty couldn't make it. How I wished she could ):

Adventure Training Camp. 22Nov-24Noy. (:
ATC was awesomely funtabulouso. My campmates were so great, hyper and loud. My CI, Sir Elias, was great. Funny guy. "focus,focus" Hahaha! :p

The campfire night was so fun. I lost my voice throughout the camp but still shouting. All the SIRs and MAAMs there were so great. Cute, pretty, fun, EVERYTHING (:

The best camp ever. Shockingly, I'm looking foward to Survival Camp. Hee. :p

noi.

LABELS: so many things happening. so little time.

HAPPY ONE YEAR NOIZ!

2007-11-16T01:02:00.000+08:00

First and foremost, HAPPY ONE YEAR TO NOIZ. Its on the 13NOVEMBER by the way. We went Zaty's house and surprise her with chocolate cake. After much fun eating and putting cakes on each other's faces, me and Fid headed to Parkway Parade to buy some stuff. With oily and smelly faces and hairs, we headed there. It was still fun though. I hope you girls love your love letters. Oh ya, met boify there. Seeing him made me realise how much I really miss him.

1 year birthday cake to NOIZ. (:

Boyfriend XD

noi.

LABELS: Happy Noiz. XD

2007-11-08T23:34:00.000+08:00

Went out just now and did some catching up with Nidya. Didnt took photos with her cause I couldn't find my bladehh camera. I have been busy with super shitloads of stuffs lately. Going dates with Fid, Ima, Nidya and people except my boify don't ask me why. Maybe next week then I'll be meeting him. I'll blog abut him the next time.

I'm waiting for the photos from the movie date from Fid. I went out on a movie date with her. It was so super effingly giler babi nak mampos funny. From the start of the day till the end. Going to the wrong place on the cinema, wanting to take the wrong escalator, FID almost fall. It was just hilarious. I just love going out and camwhoring buruk-ly with her. XD

Last of raya photos. (:

noi.

LABELS: I just realised how much I miss Nur Ezzaty Bte Rahmat.

To her,

Hey love. Do cheer up eh hun. Things will get better I'm sure. Do ring me if you feel like it okay. (:

Selamat Hari Raya ^.^

2007-10-31T22:12:00.000+08:00

Open house. ^.^

LABELS: imy

Useless.

2007-10-26T23:23:00.000+08:00

First and foremost, its still never too late to wish selamat hari raya to all umat Islam.

Well done to those who completed the ibadah puasa.

I just received my results slip.

It was bad.

It was ugly.

It was ultimately disappointing.

Having dropped all subjects, the overall marks was pulled down.

But whatever it is, I thank god that I passed the overall and was promoted to Express next year.

I bet that my dad isn't the least happy with the outcome of my studies for the whole year.

I didn't meet up his expectations.

I know I didn't do my best because I know I can do better.

Maybe I was just so tensed up with the surroundings.

Exam period, people really studying and people kept on asking me about my past results or how hard the paper was or even how bad they've done for the paper although they are the smart-alex around.

Oh my. I just can't have these type of surroundings around.

All I know now is to really buck up next year.

I've just noticed a lil something aboout myself.

I noticed that I'm really useless.

I don't do well in studies, I can't dance not keko-ly, I'm really slow and dumb & very useless in everything I do.

Oh ya, and sometimes, I'm common sense-less.

Oh wow how wonderful. (:

noi.

LABELS: I'm such a dumbass.dumbshit.

2007-10-21T02:16:00.000+08:00

I could sit in this house

In this room, in this bed

Just as long as I’m feeling this way

And boy since you’ve been away I cant sleep,

I’ve been awake

I just lay here trying to deal with this pain..

Four walls and no you (wow)

The silence in this room is so loud

No one else can fix it but you

It’s just so hard to face

I lost you

Why’d I throw your heart away

Now I’m going down

Like I’m on the ground

I lost you, I lost you (baby)

I’m sitting here wishing I could change the past

Knowing deep inside I can’t get my baby back

I lost you, I lost you

Oh baby I just cant stand the way that I lost you

I’ve been trying

To put the pieces of a picture

Back together

But it just don't look the same

(I feel sick I need a medic) Cause my heart’s stopped beating

And I feel like I’m slipping away

Four walls and no you (no you oh wow)

The silence in this room is so loud

No one else can fix it but you

It’s just so hard to face

I lost you

why’d I throw your heart away

Now I’m going down

Like I’m on the ground

I lost you, I lost you

I’m sitting here wishing

I could change the past

Knowing deep inside can’t get my baby back

I lost you, I lost you

Oh baby I just cant stand the way that I lost you

And I don’t know how

I’m gonna make it

I’m going crazy

But maybe somehow

You can find your way

Find your way back to me

It’s just so hard to face

I lost you

why’d I throw your heart away

Now I’m going down

Like I’m on the ground

I lost you, I lost you

I’m sitting here wishing I could change the past

Knowing deep inside can’t get my baby back

I lost you, I lost you

(and I cant stand the way)

I just cant stand the way that I lost you

It’s just so hard to face

I lost you

Why’d I throw your heart away

Now I’m going down

Like I’m on the ground

I lost you, I lost you…

post exam celebration./11oct

2007-10-17T19:13:00.000+08:00

i love love love her.

waymie. XDD

another girl i love. (:

that hot chinese tall guy ;)

this people, i love so so much. (: (picture stolen from dear fid. )

Examinations can just go suck balls.

2007-10-07T02:31:00.000+08:00

Its exam period and I'm still slacking. I cannot absorb anything in this common sense-less brain of mine. Science paper was so hard. I don't have any hope for it. History was worse. Didn't manage to complete it. Maths was fine but still difficult. Malay was a-okeh but don't wish to get my hopes high. I'm left with Literature, Geography and Art paper. I suck at all subjects. No hope. My brain isn't working anymore. All my brain cells are DEAD. I'm lucky if i get the combination I want at the EOY. Best of luck noi. (:

noi.

LABELS:

My bloggie has turned a year 4 days old. YAY-ness to my bloggie. (:

Dxo.

2007-10-07T01:21:00.000+08:00

Went Dxo on the 29.09.07. Went to watch Kak Ain for her singing competition. She was superb but the judges was bias. She didnt went the next round. It was disappointing but she was alright. We camwhored there. Everywhere. There was Kak ika, Naz, Kak juli, Kak ain, Qush and Is. It was so fun.

noi.

LABELS: kak ain, don't worry, you were GREAT! (:

'SSS',secret sharing session

2007-09-30T22:45:00.000+08:00

It was a great + sad day today. I had a secret sharing session with Dear Mallie. We shared almost everything. So open with her. It felt easy talking to her about merel y anything. Won't go on to the details. It was funny seeing how she reacted on the way home. Giggling all the way. Hee. So gerek la. On the side, it was also saddening because it was the last lesson of the study group. I'm going to miss the study group alot. I wish B all the best for his N levels. Hope all your efforts don't go down the drain. Sayang, don't ever give up kay? (:

noi.

LABELS:Good luck for your N levels sayang.

i have mood swing.

2007-09-25T23:45:00.000+08:00

I feel so angry.
I am always grumpy.
I want to shout.
I feel like scolding people.
I feel like crying all the time.
I cannot concentrate on my studies.
I feel so sleepy.
I feel so shitty.
I may be frolicsome in school but I'm atually NOT.
Its just a face.
Its all plastic.
ALL I WANT NOW IS TO BE ABLE TO CONCENTRATE. PERIOD.
EOY IS NEXT WEEK DAMNIT.
I can do this. I know I can. I just have to believe it.

ardillah ramong wilasti.

B, happy 3rd month to us!
It just put a HUGE smile on my face.
I love you la bacin. (:

Noi.

LABELS: ilovemybacin.(:

home sweet home.

2007-09-22T23:17:00.000+08:00

What does 'home sweet home' means? I wonder. Well, remind me again why sometimes I don't find it sweet being at home. Its such a torture being at home. With brother and sisters like them, no surprise why I always spend my time outside rather than at home. Hmm. Even the ELDEST sister admitted that her workmates are the people she loves more than her family. How wow huh. About the brother. For a second there I thought that he has changed. For the better. Can talk to and stuff. But I was wrong. So wrong. Yes I know you want to 'train' us for the working life with all those baddies or whatever you want to call it. But come on la. We do have feeling do you know that? Oh wait. Do you even know what does feelings means or caring about people's feelings? I think you don't. You just 'add fuel to the fire' or 'putting more salt to the wound'. You made things worse. Excuse me. I KEPT YOUR SECRET. SOMETHING THAT I HAPPENED TO FIND OUT. I do not tell mum about it. I dont even DARE to ask you. You are like a stranger I do not know but you are part of my life. The other older sister. I pity her. Do ther rest of you have to shoot her like that at once. She already feels sad and so many things are happening in her life and i can tell tat its very hectic for her. She is so stress. She has exams. She has problems. She needs our support la Kakak and Abang. Stop being so tough or hard headed with her. She has no other people to rely on cos we are her SIBLINGS. Now I'm the only one she relies on. She cannot rely on you both. Know why? Cos you both are just HOPELESS! No care and concern to your own adik. When you see someone at home crying or is sad, do you come and comfort? NO! You don't. I wonder if you still see us as your adiks. You can find me tearing up writing this post. You can call me crybaby or cengeng or whatever fuck I DONT CARE! I don't think mum and dad brought us up to be like this. Stranger towards each other. Raya is coming. The first day. The forgiving each other day. Over the years, I dont think that its useful uh. You forgive each other at the end of the day, you will still hurt each other. Another thing, it has always been the younger apologising to the older and the older just sits and say 'hmm' or even just smile. The older never apologises. I'm terribly sure that mum and dad, especially mum, is disappointed to see us like this. She is pressurized by this. All she'll say is "this is the part and parcel of life. asam garam hidup. it will change". Well, i hope it will. Everyday after my daily prayers, I'll seek for forgiveness and I'll always pray to Allah that they* will change. Change for the better and treat us better. I love them. They all. The three of them plus my mum and dad of cos. I really do. But its difficult. With a brother who doesn't talk to me or regard me as his his own flesh and blood, sisters who doesnt talk and get along with each other, tell me how to help them. I'm helpless. I do not know how to help them. All I can do now is cry and pray. I think I've said this the kezillion time that I envy other people's families or easy to say, their siblings. How close thier bond and relationship is. Well, I shall not dwell on it anymore cos its not worth it. All my efforts are wasted all went down the drain. Well, all is not lost. Im still the same old next door girl. A very optimistic girl. (:

Noi.

LABELS: I STILL LOVE THEM.

holidays.

2007-09-10T20:28:00.000+08:00

The rest of it. (:

This entry and the previous entry are what I've been doing during the holiday. Enjoy. (:

3D2N CAMP.

THOSE TWO GUYS.

THE WHOLE CAHOLT.
ANGELS' KNIGHTS.

CIKGU RAMNA'S WEDDING.

THAT GUY.

pictures galore

2007-09-09T18:23:00.000+08:00

*Primary School Memories.

*2nd month anniversary. 26/08/07

*YIA dance practices/heartstring walk.

*Teacher's Day '07 & Hip Hop Fiesta @ RP.

Primary school memories.

2nd month anniversary :D

2nd month cake.

YIA.

Dance practices and Heart string walk.

Teacher's day & HipHop Fiesta at RP

national day.

2007-08-10T23:36:00.000+08:00

I'm just plain lazy to blog about yesterday. All I'll say is that yesterday was great. But it could have been greater if Zaty and Ima was there.

Grandparents house.

2007-08-03T16:18:00.000+08:00

MAKAN-MAKAN.

SILAT.

transformers/racial harmony

2007-07-21T21:08:00.000+08:00

-Transformers with Wawa Diva.

-Racial Harmony Day.

On the 14July, me and kak wawa went to watch Transformers. We went Cineplex then Lido then Cineleisure. We WALKED from Cineplex cos nomore available seats left!

It was worth the walk. There are SUPER DUPER truckloads of photos. (:

Racial Harmony Day! (:

We camwhored. There is SUPER DUPER LOADS of photos.

Shitty shit

2007-07-09T00:24:00.000+08:00

I've not been feeling well these few days. I've been sick and still not getting better. Whatever it is, I'm still alive and surviving. :p School have been sucky lately. Maths becoming suckier and science sucks even more. Tons of incomplete homeworks to get done by this week. Its very tiring.
To him*,
You asked why the sad faces. Well I don't know why but its difficult to tell you. Blogging about it is the most easiest way. Actually its nothing. Nothing important to you. Anyways, I feel that we are drifting apart. You don't talk to me nowadays. You talk to them but not to me. Maybe, you don't need me anymore or better still, you've grown tired of me(I'm sure of this cos I'm the most boring girl and macam cepat basi gitu). Oh no, tsk, I'm just a friend antara all those other friends of yours. Ish. Nothing more I'm sure. I just want to say that I'm glad, very glad that you were there when I needed you. You lent me your ears and listen to all my craps and shit stuffs. You are the friend that I needed most and will always do but whatever it is, you don't need to apologize I still love you. (:
p.s:If you're reading this, please dont mind for the lame ass shit I've been writing.

sports day 07'

2007-07-06T20:58:00.000+08:00

This post is like very the late. I've been sick lately. Over-exhausted as usual. Didnt went to school yesterday. Was rotting the whole day yesterday at home. I'm sick. Still am. Tomorrow is the day. Speech day. Sheeeeesh!

Last Friday, it was sports day. It was so hot. Tak boleh angkat. Heh. Mohegan lost this year. But nehmind theres always next year. Oh ya, I looked like an ugleh bitch with the thick make-up which was done by Ms D. And oh, Zaty saw one of the Fantastic Four dancer and we snapped a photo with him.

I love my brother. I love my sisters. I love my family. Dont ask why I suddenly say this. I just feel like saying.

I love NOIZ to death. I love NOIZ. I love NOIZ. I love NOIZ.

I love my boyfriend too. (:

cherobics

2007-06-25T23:30:00.000+08:00

Went to watch cherobics with my fellow cheermates. The cheerleading was superb. Me and Zaty camwhored like sooo fast and in the end, I looked ugleh. But who cares. I love camwhoring with my dearest dearest Nur Ezzaty Bte Rahmat. Met Ardillah after that. We went esplande, then go mamam then headed back home. We took the longer journey. It was soo fun.

Syam, remember this place? These two artworks. Heh.

<3 Nur Ezzaty Bte Rahmat & Ardillah Ramong Wilasti (:

Primary school mates, Tanjong Pinang, CSSP

2007-06-23T18:41:00.000+08:00

BACK! Finally back home. After the Tanjong Pinang trip and CSSP camp, I'm finally home. The Tanjong Pinang trip was awesome. The CSSP camp was also awesome. I love my group mates. But too bad, we bond as a whole group at the second last day. But look on the bright side, I'm meeting them soon. (:

TANJONG PINANG! (:

Ex-keming outing! (:

the guys made us look like minahs cos they look like mats. haha. it was fun but didnt hang out with them all the whole day. girls went home early. guys went to 'drink'. some of them.

Biol people

2007-06-14T00:38:00.000+08:00

Met up with Ardillah and Syam again to give Syam his present in advance. As usual, they were very 'early'. 21st century, girls wait for guys. Heh. We went esplanade, lepak-lepak and camwhored. 9 plus then we headed to Marina Square to grab a bite. Then we went home. Sounds boring but it was fun and Syam couldn't wait to open his present. I'm glad that he is happy with the present. Oh ya, I got a piggyback from SYAM! hehe. It was great la. Ardillah, Syam was awesome. Oh ya, these guys can really be good with cameras. :p

Syam looks seducing siak! Hehe.

<3 Ardillah Ramong Wilasti & Muhammad Noorsyam. (:

change

2007-06-12T20:58:00.000+08:00

Somehow, just somehow people change. Even the people closest to you change. It feels awkward being around them now. It feels like you do not know them anymore. Whenever with them around, there are always things they will whisper or eye contacts which are suspicious and not wanting me to know. Oh well, its not something new. Somethings have changed for the better while some are getting worse. Why? I do not know. But being left out or always monologging is definitely the things I always do. I'm tired. Very tired. I'm just 14, shouldn't I be enjoying my youth rather than thinking about all these little unimportant yet hurtful things. Hmm. I need motivation. I need someone to motivate me. Help me up when I'm down. I don't ask for anything more except that. I guess thats too much to ask from anyone.

outing with dila n syam

2007-06-10T23:15:00.000+08:00

Pictures! Pictures!

1. Coulcillor camp.

2. Cikgu Diana's farewell cake.

3. 4PM motivational talk.

4. Outing.

Met Syam, Ardillah, Fid & Yas. OMG, Syam is HOT and Ardilah is CUTE! Okay shh! I'm like so short standing between them. It was fun going out with them. Awesome-est people. :DD

Biol,Bongok,Belo. :D (they are smiling) Wondering what in the world Ardillah is doing, he is trying to immitate\resemble ME! -.-

He is so cute. :p

Finally, I met him. He is HOT. :D

3. Motivational talk at 4PM.

The talk was great. Had fun after that.

2. Cikgu Diana's farewell.

The ugly looking but delicious cake was baked by dearest NOIZ with love for cikgu diana who is leaving us. Good luck with her baby! (:

1. Councillor camp.

Day camp, quite fun. Spongebob, my group won. Yipee! And FOINZZ won for the 'dance' hehe.

27may2007

2007-05-27T23:55:00.000+08:00

Somehow, things have changed. People around seemed to have changed. Don't ask how, they just seemed to have changed. All I know, now I don't feel the HAPPY RETARDED me. I can be so super duper retarded. I was so happy yesterday but so down today. My mood is so unpredictable. I'm so weird nowadays. I don't know why. Kakak Shikin is always irritated by ME cos of my retarded-ness. It's so fun to irritate her. Now, I'm very excited about the outings. I can't wait to go out with my old mates. I miss them. But I do not know what to wear. Should I dress up or should I just wear something plain? I do not know. Million things are in my mind now. I'm thinking about my cheerleading, the outings(especially the one i'm looking foward to), speech day, the guy who called my a liar(I'm so f*cking sad about it), and millions of things. It has been awhile since I talked/chatted to him. *Sigh*. Okay, I'm so bored. Oh ya, the entry about the outing yesterday will be posted next week with NOIZ outing. Okay bye.
p.s: I, Nur Syafawati daughter of Jamlan, love NOIZ to death. I too love Nidya, Naz, Kak Ika and my netballers very much.

changi

2007-05-27T02:00:00.000+08:00

So, there wasnt any NOIZ outing. Pfft! I totally hate this June badly! Councillor camp was fun. The motivational talk was great. The jalan jalan at TM was funny and memalukan. Looking foward to Tanjong Pinang trip with Ima family and Fid I think. I was supposed to go out and watch POC on thursday but my dad went beserk and started nagging so it was cancelled and I was the bad one for cancelling it. And there is another councillor camp at Old PA. Scary seh. Haunted. K the photos. Outing with Fid and and Zaty. Best. The photos yang 4pm i upload when i get all the photos from Fid.

outing with kak zie

2007-05-20T23:06:00.000+08:00

Pictures!Pictures! At last.

The outing just now was so fun. Ivan and Albert is so funny. Especially Ivan. Hes such a gentleman. Going out with them all really made my weekend. They put a BIG smile on my face. Yesterday night was the greatest. Kak shikin was working night shift so the room was mine and kak zie's. We bitched and had sisters talk while combing each others hair. I really hoped that we would talk like this more cos it will just make us closer (:

I look ugly in the pictures but who cares! (:

Before the MYE, me and kak zie met up with nadiah(cousin) to study. Nadiah needed help with her POA and kak zie guided her. We studied for awhile then went window shopping. :p

P.S: PEOPLE! NOTICE MY CAREBEAR TEE :p

7 MAY!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY KAK ZIE! I LOVE YOU TO BITS.
P.S: Her cake was a spiderman cake. :p

This is extra and ugly. I was trying to look like kak zie but failed :p shes too fair and too pretty. (:

liar

2007-05-18T23:19:00.000+08:00

Oh my F**king gosh! Oh how great is it that now I'm known as the liar. How fabuloso. Fark uh. If you are planinng to crash me down real bad, well, I seriously got to congratulate you cos you've done it. What did I do? What lies or insults have I made? I dont remember lying or insulting you or anyone. If I did, I'm sure I dont mean it and I'm terribly sorry. But you've really got to tell me if I did. I've really alot of confessions to make and I dont even know where to start. I dont even know who can really be trusted right now. I feel sooooooo down. No one cares anymore. Not even the ones who I trust completely. I'm so sad and could break down into tears. I feel like giving up eveything and everyone. I think i should start by not contacting anyone anymore. Being a bitch is already bad anough and now a liar. How bad can i really be? Neh, I just want to say to anyone who is reading this, to just stay far far away from me. I dont want anyone to get hurt anymore. Enough is enough noi. Nomore of your crappy shit. Aaaah shitla! I need my netball girls. Especially NIDYA! Oh my i need her more than anything else. Oh fark now tears are rolling down my cheeks. *Snap,snap* NOI!, stay home during the hols. NO OUTINGS for you. You don't deserve anything right now. ))):
p.s:I NEED NIDYA DARLING! ):

carebear

2007-05-14T15:47:00.000+08:00

PEOPLE!! I LOVE CAREBEAR! (:

and I want a Grumpy bear badly):

EXAMS ARE OVER AND I YEARN FOR AN OUTING!!

2007-05-12T17:28:00.000+08:00

Finally, exams are over. Only Art is left. Phew. I screw up my papers real badly but I did study for Mid Year. I just hope I won't fail it all.
So far, things around have been sucky. Quite sucky. ehdjdunsmihferykwndcj! Screw you all those sucky things and people.
To him*,
*snap, snap* I don't like you. Get it? I just don't. Don't make me hate you. And stop being a nuisance. Thank you.
To her*,
Yes, I saw the video you made. I cried. You saw me cry. I was touched. But the main thing why I cried is when I don't see my picture there when the part showed about the people who helped you pick up the broken pieces and helped you get together again. Didn't I helped you at all? I even saw our cousin's face but I don't mine. I wonder why. I've been by your side the whole time. It just simply shows that I don't mean a thing. Sometimes you want me to listen to your day and stories. I was there ready for you. But whenever I needed someone to talk to, were you there? Even if you were, you didn't even want to listen. I am greatly disappointed. Especially you are the one i trust most. I know you treasure your friends more. I know they are your fisrt priority. But don't treat me like I am nothing.

My art piece is a mess. The drawings are a mess and the paintings are so horrible. Really horrible. I think I'm going to fail my art too. *Sigh* I'm just not an art person i guess.
"What do you say about a guy you've known only a few days and he asks you out?"
Well, in my point of view, it is super scary. You don't even know the person AT ALL yet want to go out. Is he like some despo or something because it's just scary. He may be some bad meanie. You do not know. So, yeah.
Oh ya, I melted. Someone sang me a song. A very nice song.
I can't wait for tomorrow. Shopping with Kak shikin. :DD

worthless.

2007-05-01T01:29:00.000+08:00

I guess you don't need me anymore. I mean nothing now. Oh well, let it be. I feel so down. ):

oda/yas bdae!

2007-04-15T21:53:00.000+08:00

FID/YAS BIRTHDAY!

Today's outing was amazingly awesomely great. We really had a great time. Everything was not according to plan but overall it was great. We alighted at tanglin mall, and walked all the way to town.(i wont say about what happened at the condo #%&*^%!!) We ate at puncak we had fun eating. ima was burping loudly and laughing all the way. best seh. then after that we snapped neoprints. it turned out ugleh. After that, we walked endlessly and there was an misunderstanding but in the end, it worked out. it was lovely.

We bought cake at taka and headed for the memorial place near esplanade there. Me and zaty went around asking for lighter coz fid wanted to make a wish. fid suap yas and yas suap fid cake. cute nak mamp oi. oh my today was superly fun. fadzly and raymi my camwhore partners. :D let the photos do the talking la!

we were standing at the first cabin. everyone i mean everyone was looking at us. some iwa and noiz.

noi and raymi. ala cnt see the dimples. pfft
oda duduk cam apek. yas nga ketawe.
cute kan???? cutest compatible pair ;)
reflections.
noi and ima :D

1st picture of the day.
my favourite picture :DD april babies.
wohoo us!
the tigger, was from me to her.
real people tau. and zaty was literally shouting and poeple started crowding and looking at us taking photos. :DD

:DD
noi,fadzly, ima. we forced him to squeeze with us.
this is candid.
cute luhh
bdae girl and noi.

cute la drg potong cake
see his hand. the first photo of them cutting cake. malu nak mamp
she edited it not me. oda suap yas. :DD
cut cake lagi.
fadzly and noi.

Dear FID,

hey beloved, happy birthday. i hope you had an amazing time just now. i know i did. although there was some misunderstandings yet we made it all work. there was ups and downs and hardships in our friendships, in the end you are still there. especially with ima and zaty. i love you all to bits. you all make me smile everyday. you all rock my socks. hey just now,first move aje still have more to come surely believe me ;) eh just now was the best outing ever! have more of this outings uh. hey girlfriend, smile always and be cheerful everytime. no sad faces kay. set a goal and achieve them. never give up on your dream. cherish them. stay cute bubbly and pretty always tau. remember, i'm always here. In need of help, look for me. i will be there. 24/7. i love you always. :)

2007-04-12T21:00:00.000+08:00

I'M F**KING SAD RIGHT NOW ): BYE.

2007-04-10T20:07:00.000+08:00

10 APRIL!

Today was boring yet so great. Alot of hugs. As a result, i got two boo-boos on my both knee cos of my GFs. Haha. They were like "this shows our kasih sayang tau." Hahahaha. I was pushed in the toilet then in the shower and i was wet from head to toe. But it was great. I received many presents, wishes and testimonials. THANKIE YOU people. I Love each and every one of you. You all made my 14th birthday a memorable one. I'm just looking foward to this Sunday's outing with the girls maybe with the iwa cos we celebrating Yasier's bdae too. 3 in 1. Noi(10/4), Yas(14/4),Oda (15/4). Maybe to town(movies/jalan jalan) OR escape. I hope we going town bcoz i want to dress up :DD

oh ya, here is today's photo. ayah is working, kak zie is at her night classes, kak shikin is going to work so, not everyone is here. :((

my and ibu's truffle cake.

April babies. noi(10/4) ibu (9/4)

kakak noi and abg.

noi and abg. maner jer dier tgk tau.

noi and kak kin.

Mukhsin.

2007-04-08T19:51:00.000+08:00

Okay i've managed to accomplish something. That is, watching Mukhsin. Mukhsin is a must watch. Its the prequel of Sepet. The script was great and the story line was awesome and Mukhsin is cute. The ending is sad too. Little Orked is sooo cute. There was JASON! and he was with Orked(Sharifah Amani). Cute seh. Oh ya, i watched it with Kak Shikin at VIVO. I was late. I was expected to be there before her. And oh, see my loooong list. hehe. Anyone, just anyone bring me to the movies pleeeasee . One show at least one more show. )):

5 more days to 10 april

2007-04-05T22:00:00.000+08:00

My birthday is coming!Its 5 days away but somehow i dont feel that enthu or excited. I feel rather sad actually. I think i am down with a temperature. I am having a blocked/running nose, my tekak is kiling me,my eyes are swell up, i haven't eaten the whole day, i feel so hungry til i have no mood to eat(crap). I really want to join the dance but as usual, they, just wont allow. why wont they allow me to dance outside? Oh my job now is to study,study and study and silat. Nothing more. Want to dance, only in school. They just dont understand maybe. You see, I've been choosen, I've been choosen to dance. Its not that im bragging but it just means i have the talent to dance. I want to dance. Neh it looks like I am not going to dance anymore except for teacher's day. They could have just said no when i asked you if i can join the dance. You could have spared the lecture. I've heard the same lecture everytime. It just makes me go all watery and teary. It just sucks. It does. I've told you everything everytime. It just shows that you dont have trust in me. thats all. I explains all. I can control myself, i can take care of myself you see. Grrrrr. Im tired. Im just tired. Tired of crying tired of telling you things tired of you not appreciating me and dont bother to listen. When i tried to share my problems or tried to be close to you, you wont listen or in the end i get a lecture or a scolding. Well i've heard enough. Please nomore of your same old lecture. it will just make me go a distance away or further from you. Oh well, i just cant be bothered anymore.
My birthday is coming and this is what i get. Oh how great! Thats just superb. How amazing it could be. I suggest you do it more oftenly. Especially on special occasions huh. ;) . Whatever. I have no plans for my birthday, i think i'll just stay home and rot with chocolates and ice creams. Thats the best thing that could have happened to me. I want to go to the movies and have a movie marathon. I want to watch stomp the yard, meet the robinsons, freedom writers, mukshin, tmnt, mr bean's holidays.. Oh my, i am so pathetic la. No one to go with. My gfs, they have their own plans. So, i will just occupy myself with the chocolates and ice creams. All the fatty junks. I guess im going to get fatter lah.. *sigh* k byess.